Attorney says Thank You for Dealing With People You Can’t Stand

by Dr. Rick Kirschner on July 16, 2012

Dealing With People You Can't StandHi blog reader!  I just got an unsolicited testimonial in my email from a San Diego, California attorney regarding my coauthored book, Dealing With People You Can’t Stand, and it just made me smile ear to ear.  So i thought I’d make it this week’s post.  Think of it this way:  Here’s proof that you can not only turn around a bad situation, but you can be proactive about preventing more of them!   Without further adieu, enjoy.
Dear Drs. Rick,
I am a veteran trial lawyer and bought your book “Dealing with People You Can’t Stand” several years ago on a whim.  I didn’t really delve in and read it much until I was struggling to find a way to open settlement negotiations with opposing counsel on a bitterly fought, multi-million dollar lawsuit.  I identified the behavior type of opposing counsel and followed your instructions on how to deal with them to the letter.  I must say it was counterintuitive and actually galled me at the time to express “appreciation” to someone who had made my life a living hell for months on end.However, I had nothing to lose at that point and thought I would try your advice.  And, by God, it worked!  It changed the dynamic and allowed this absolutely miserable person to work with us and finally frame a resolution and settlement.  Armed with that experience, I have used the book again and again to settle cases, and have even shared the principles with my office coworkers to help mitigate interoffice friction when we are stressed with deadlines.  Quite often you will hear stuff like “I’m in Tank mode today” around the office, meaning stop interrupting me and let me get this project done.  We are actually putting up the chart from the book on the wall with moveable arrows where everyone can check in their status for the day so the rest of us know how to deal with them.

She also shared some of the court record that showed that opposing council in one of her cases protested to the judge that she had ‘Dealing With People You Can’t Stand,’ on the table during the trial.  Makes me so happy!That’s it for this week.  If you’ve used the book and had a great experience (or not so great too!) please do comment!  And, if you have a mind so, write a review on, where we have a stalker out to sabotage the book.  She’s probably trying to keep people from knowing how to deal with her, but a review from you will set it right!

Be well,

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