August 19, 2008
Though I think ‘The Secret’ (say it in hushed tones!) is a brilliant marketing program organized around wishful thinking, still, I am a big believer in the value of affirmations. So how can that be? I don’t believe in the magical power of affirmations as a new agey tool that gives you access to the catalog of goodies in the sky, delivered by a genie, a stork or Santa to the good little boys and girls who say the magic words. But I recognize affirmation as a valuable way of focusing the mind, strengthening one’s vision and clarity of purpose, and navigating forward in the presence of static, backlash and gorilla dust! And since people use them all the time anyway, I figure you might as well use them wisely.
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August 17, 2008
In lieu of having shared values with people we seek to work with, lead, manage or persuade, our main vector of approach is through behavioral blending. That’s where we send signals to others that we are on the same side. Since we people are more alike than different anyway, finding common ground ought to be a fairly simple proposition. Yet most people find it incredibly hard to do when their attention is on the differences that divide us one from another. That’s why the idea of blending is to move to common ground as quickly as possible.
Something as seemingly inconsequential as how fast or slow you talk, how loud or quiet you are, how assertive or passive you are, and even whether you’re standing or sitting, can have profoundly powerful effects on people sorting through their differences. They create enough of a connection, enough of a sense of common ground, that you may actually succeed in identifying more meaningful areas of common interest, and even work together for some soon to be agreed upon common good.
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